Why all the drama?

Ever since I can remember I have lived my life as if it was a movie, with a narrator in first person, meaning me narrating the whole story. I put music and that's the soundtrack, and if I'm on the streets with my ipod, that sets up the mood, and people around me become the movie's extras, it's like filming exteriors,and me, of course, in the starring role. But then I wonder why have I always felt different in a way from the rest of the people? They have emotions, their lives are roller coasters as well, why do I think my life has a different meaning, or is more transcendental, as I belong more to a movie than to real life?

Why all the drama? Why oh why? Maybe it has to do with my depressive side, or should it be the contrary and it takes it from my dreamer and more positive side?

Whatever the reason, I cannot help it, the drama is there, the stomachache, the feeling deeply bad for things that most of the time don't deserve the attention. I give things so much thought, regret having done things differently or better most of the time, why?? My mind is restless, it never stops thinking about just anything, it's like self brain-torture, I end up really tired sometimes.

I wish I could let go of everything, forget about the world, forgive myself for my mistakes, not be so hard at me. But it's my movie, maybe I'm leaning more towards a tragicomedy, rather than just entertainment, and is not fair, life is short as we all know, I should be having a ball, rather than torturing myself for everything I don't do properly.

For instance, I'm already questioning the quality of this post, what kind of significance can it have, how meaningless it really is, when all I wanted to do was just let go of this current anxiety that I'm going through.

Let it go Aura, it will be just fine!